Now there you are my beautiful expectators, Oh another month is over… God knows how time flies when you’re having fun. Anyway my weekend is very beautiful, I had a very long time with my computer pushing keyboards with my not so new game “Morrowind --- The Elders Scrolls”… I love playing this game.
I am also very happy that my new found love singer won the Grammy for the best new artist, of course “Adele” no doubt about it with her album “19”. I had her album since last December last year, a good friends of mine gave it to me and take note its not pirated they bought it for me from Bangkok airport. I am also happy to the fact that the former Mrs. Cruz wrote me a nose-bleeding, ear splitting but somewhat beautiful letter, telling me how things are with her life. She’s good I guess… she’s been through a lot since that very sad affair with his former gay friend and his former boyfriend. Well I have to tackle that talk in the future.
Anyway… since valentine’s day is fast approaching and love is in the air my great expectators. I know you expect me to write about love… yes L-O-V-E… love… well what can I say about love… I just tell you something funny and sweet that happened to me a long time ago… every valentines day it still makes me smile just thinking about it.
I used to have a great admiration and love for this guy who lived with us in our beautiful apartment in Teachers Village QC a long time ago. He is very sweet and matured and cute and manly and confident and sexy and intelligent and funny sometimes and serious most of the time and he’s well traveled and in love with a prince in Malaysia and I don’t know… why I love him… I love him for the man he wants to be and I love him for the man he almost is… but that was before… now I still remember him but I don’t remember the feeling anymore.
For all the time that he stayed in that sweet apartment he never knew that I’m in love with him secretly… like I do stuff a gay in love with a man, like cooking good food for him, like watching him and sniffed his perfume in the doorway when he goes for work, like smile secretly when he comes back home after a long work, like feeling sad and count the days when he travels for month, like knowing and loving thing he likes, like trying to be the best and good with myself in hope that he might notice me, Like things you do when you’re in love… its achingly painful but sweet… After years of putting that feeling in the remotest corner of my heart… I mean I cannot tell what I felt to my friends because we are in the same circle of friends… so I just waited and come what may until that day when I heard that he’s going to Malaysia to work…
I was so sad and afraid that I might not say what’s inside of me… so one day I decided to tell him in the most awkward way ( of course it’s always awkward to be vulnerable )… One evening a week before he’s going abroad I cook a special dinner for him luckily we were alone at that time… I served him my famous adobong pusit ( squid adobo )… which he like so much too… In the middle of our dinner… I just stop him eating when I told him… I LOVE YOU… and that’s it… my face become red and I waited for what he gonna say back to me… it took him a couple of minutes which felt like forever before he replied to me. I didn’t notice that tears are flowing out of my eyes when he said that he’s going faraway and that he cannot say anything at the moment. But nevertheless I still took it as a NO… or it might be I scared him… I don’t know…
I am also very happy that my new found love singer won the Grammy for the best new artist, of course “Adele” no doubt about it with her album “19”. I had her album since last December last year, a good friends of mine gave it to me and take note its not pirated they bought it for me from Bangkok airport. I am also happy to the fact that the former Mrs. Cruz wrote me a nose-bleeding, ear splitting but somewhat beautiful letter, telling me how things are with her life. She’s good I guess… she’s been through a lot since that very sad affair with his former gay friend and his former boyfriend. Well I have to tackle that talk in the future.
Anyway… since valentine’s day is fast approaching and love is in the air my great expectators. I know you expect me to write about love… yes L-O-V-E… love… well what can I say about love… I just tell you something funny and sweet that happened to me a long time ago… every valentines day it still makes me smile just thinking about it.
I used to have a great admiration and love for this guy who lived with us in our beautiful apartment in Teachers Village QC a long time ago. He is very sweet and matured and cute and manly and confident and sexy and intelligent and funny sometimes and serious most of the time and he’s well traveled and in love with a prince in Malaysia and I don’t know… why I love him… I love him for the man he wants to be and I love him for the man he almost is… but that was before… now I still remember him but I don’t remember the feeling anymore.
For all the time that he stayed in that sweet apartment he never knew that I’m in love with him secretly… like I do stuff a gay in love with a man, like cooking good food for him, like watching him and sniffed his perfume in the doorway when he goes for work, like smile secretly when he comes back home after a long work, like feeling sad and count the days when he travels for month, like knowing and loving thing he likes, like trying to be the best and good with myself in hope that he might notice me, Like things you do when you’re in love… its achingly painful but sweet… After years of putting that feeling in the remotest corner of my heart… I mean I cannot tell what I felt to my friends because we are in the same circle of friends… so I just waited and come what may until that day when I heard that he’s going to Malaysia to work…
I was so sad and afraid that I might not say what’s inside of me… so one day I decided to tell him in the most awkward way ( of course it’s always awkward to be vulnerable )… One evening a week before he’s going abroad I cook a special dinner for him luckily we were alone at that time… I served him my famous adobong pusit ( squid adobo )… which he like so much too… In the middle of our dinner… I just stop him eating when I told him… I LOVE YOU… and that’s it… my face become red and I waited for what he gonna say back to me… it took him a couple of minutes which felt like forever before he replied to me. I didn’t notice that tears are flowing out of my eyes when he said that he’s going faraway and that he cannot say anything at the moment. But nevertheless I still took it as a NO… or it might be I scared him… I don’t know…
But it’s clear to me that telling people with what you felt for them honestly makes a lot of difference in your life… I was so sad during that time but the moment I open everything out… I felt so exhausted but happy… and happy to the fact that at least I can do something about it now… yeah… that feeling of stepping on land after a long boat trip… that’s exactly how I felt… And with that I will tell you...
how to declare your love over a plate of adobong pusit.
Prepare… prepare yourself emotionally I know its not very easy to say something that’s very important in your life but just think of what might be the outcome of everything.
Be Brave… Be brave with your decision… If it’s a matter of the heart and not the ego there’s no reason why not stand for your decision… yeah decision in telling him or her.
Be Creative… Be creative in term of presenting your heart to him or her. It’s not just a heart but its your heart and that’s what matters most. Me of course I go for the classic situation of dinner ( with my adobong pusit ) … a homemade dinner makes me comfortable and I know he loves dining. Think of situation where you both can be comfortable.
Be pretty… you should be pleasantly pretty when you declare your love, A good comfortable attire will make your sparkle. Its ugly to see you cry with an ugly shirt. And besides looking good makes you feel comfortable.
Open up now… say the word directly without any flowery or curly cues in the end. Just say the magic word… “I LOVE YOU” and don’t put any explanation to that, leave everything to the air.
Accept… whatever his or her response you must respect that. And don’t push, just accept it…Cry your heart out if it’s no good but not in front of him or her. Nevertheless the important thing there is that you put everything at rest.
Yup that’s it kids when you felt like telling someone about your feeling to someone you love, do it now before its too late. The world is getting older and we are not superman so I think is the time for you to declare your love for him or for her…
Mwahh…. There you go little dummies…
Excuse me don’t correct my grammar again…
Prepare… prepare yourself emotionally I know its not very easy to say something that’s very important in your life but just think of what might be the outcome of everything.
Be Brave… Be brave with your decision… If it’s a matter of the heart and not the ego there’s no reason why not stand for your decision… yeah decision in telling him or her.
Be Creative… Be creative in term of presenting your heart to him or her. It’s not just a heart but its your heart and that’s what matters most. Me of course I go for the classic situation of dinner ( with my adobong pusit ) … a homemade dinner makes me comfortable and I know he loves dining. Think of situation where you both can be comfortable.
Be pretty… you should be pleasantly pretty when you declare your love, A good comfortable attire will make your sparkle. Its ugly to see you cry with an ugly shirt. And besides looking good makes you feel comfortable.
Open up now… say the word directly without any flowery or curly cues in the end. Just say the magic word… “I LOVE YOU” and don’t put any explanation to that, leave everything to the air.
Accept… whatever his or her response you must respect that. And don’t push, just accept it…Cry your heart out if it’s no good but not in front of him or her. Nevertheless the important thing there is that you put everything at rest.
Yup that’s it kids when you felt like telling someone about your feeling to someone you love, do it now before its too late. The world is getting older and we are not superman so I think is the time for you to declare your love for him or for her…
Mwahh…. There you go little dummies…
Excuse me don’t correct my grammar again…
HAPPY V-DAY!!!
4 comments:
cute!
hahaha! alam ko kung sino sya!!!!
shhhhhh... nakakahiya... no hehehehe
haay, nakakakilig naman ang essay na itoh.
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