HOW TO LIVE WITH A TAMAGOTCHI

Well… well… well… there you are my sweet, diligent and behave pupils of mine. Today I woke up with mutation in my eyes or “muta” in short. I feel like Japanese so I crawled out from my beautiful bed and walked geisha like to the fridge and look for something to eat, I found a three days old sugar-raised doughnut, it’s hard as wood so I made hot chocolate and dipped the hard bread with it and ate. I’ve read my horoscope, it warns me about not swimming in a shark infested waters… strange… I’m in a land-locked country.

Well, anyway I had the best weekend to date thanks to Ms. Frida for the good time and the wonderful dinner… and the unexpectedly wonderful massage I had last Saturday night. I enjoyed playing “Taboo” it’s good for titillating your already waning lust for life… charing… hahahahaha…

Two weeks ago my horoscope told me that a man with chinky eyes will come to me and change my life… huh… of course you know me I always believe in everything that would change my life. Anyway, the next day I received a call from Shun asking me a lot of stuff. It’s kind of strange for Shun, normally we just see each other during lunchtime at mother Helen but never bother to talk to each other. But this time he actually asked me to go out to Blue Chilli but I declined the moment he said that his taking someone with him… I don’t want to be the third wheel on the scene you know.

But in the end the strangeness finally reveals the truth. He wants to live with me; he wants to rent my other empty room. I don’t know how he knows that my empty room is available. Of course before I answered “I do” I go around researching about him. Shun is a pure breed Japanese with a beautiful “manga” eyes. He hails from Hokkaido and it’s his last two semester studying here in Cambodia before he heads back for Japan. I think his into Business Administration. I don’t know but he seems so mysterious to me and that maybe is the reason why I said “I do” (God I should really be taking that marshmallow test again which I always fail… I always say yes easily… sigh poor me) aside the fact that I needed the room to be rented for extra “lapad”.

He gets to know about my room maybe from mother Helen, He is a good person according to mother Helen which by the way won the “The most outstanding Filipino in Cambodia” presented to her by the Philippine Embassy here in Phnom Penh. I’m happy for her she really deserves it. Well, anyway… yeah I know people will say here I go again. But so far I have good intuition with this, I’m hoping. I know me and Miss Deborah didn’t fair well as housemates before but we’re already over with it. We’ve come to terms that Divas should never share a flat for it would be doomed. However I do have good housemates before that lasted for years specially the one in Teacher’s Village Q.C. and have good flat-mates here in Phnom Penh, I missed Kuky and Daniel as well.

Okay of course everyone remembers what a tamagochi is. It’s that handheld digital pet which was introduced to the world from Japan during 1996 and evolved until now. The word Tamagotchi is actually a portmanteau* meaning it’s a combination of a Japanese word “tamago” which means “egg” and the English word “watch” so it ends up to “tamagotch” but its awkward to listen so they put an “I” at the end to form the word “Tamagotchi”. But whatever is that meant to you, for me as a diva “Tamagochi” pertains to a “housemate” or to be precise a Japanese housemate.

Okay listen you dummies specially the one sitting at the back, get your pen and notebook and copy everything from the board… sigh… teaching is such a noble work… sigh…

How to live with a Tamagotchi

Prepare yourself… as an independent person living with someone is quite difficult. We with our mammalian brains are very territorial. This is very evident with our four footed cousins. So prepare yourself not to defend your territory but to open it up to someone. I know this well from past experiences.

Investigate… you don’t want to end up as another single white female, don’t you. So better to go around and ask people. Ask about his or her background from people who knew him. Ask the school, office, the restaurant he or she frequented. And finally interview him no matter how you can… don’t worry his doing the same thing for you.

Set the rules… This is quite easy because it’s your territory. Set all the rules you like as long as it’s humane, from the locking of the gate to accepting guests, to the division of basic utilities, water, electricity, gas, cables, and internet, and one more thing show him the picture of the person you don’t want to be invited or seen in your house.

Ask for documents… from passports to visa, school IDs, number of the office and give a copy to your landlord if you’re living in an apartment, give it to your lawyer if you own the place and if you don’t have a lawyer keep it.

Put in papers… again to make it official put it in word form or contract. This is the difference between a friend and a housemate because you can make it in papers. With friends it’s difficult because you have to consider a lot from the way you say it to the emotional baggage’s in the process and so on and so forth… yeah… yeah… you know what I mean.

Live normally… now that his living with you, don’t act like a controlling motherfucker or a bastard father you’ll end up cleaning his or her ass. You’re not his mother or father but his housemate. Just notice what you don’t like about him or her then in time you can tell them in a nice way.

Yes, I know what you’re thinking dummies. Don’t worry I used to live for seven years with five divas before… okay that’s it for today… don’t forget to feed your Tamagotchis.

*portmanteau is a word formed by blending sounds from two or more distinct words and combining their meaning like for example: the words “do + not” = don’t, A single word that represents the meaning of combined words…. O tandaan nyo yan ha…

HOW TO COOK BISTEK TAGALOG GALORE

Well… well… well… there you are my hungry, PG expectators and pupils of mine. Today I woke up thinking I’m a cook; well I do cook it’s my talent during beauty pageants, During the contest I do my cooking below the stage while the other contestant do their stuff… and when I’m done I’ve had my cooking distributed to the judges, sometimes they like it and sometime I won best in talent. Well anyways…

Oh my gush Mr. Magno stop speaking to me this morning because I didn’t answer his phone call last night, because I was fast asleep at 8:00 pm… which is not so very me. I was watching tombraider again while waiting for my dinner but instead I fall asleep in the process. I woke up at 3:00 am hungry, I’m dreaming of “Bistek tagalog”. I cannot sleep again so I wait for the long morning and found two miss calls in my cellphone from a number I don’t know so I just reply who are you? But it didn’t answer back so I cart-wheeled to the fridge and ate all the strawberry yogurt… I went back to my fabulous bed and slept again, I woke up late like 8:00am.
I went to my office and found these snobbish Mr. Magno not speaking to me. I opened my pc and check on my emails to find work in word form… so I closed my email and started to talked to that guy wearing a pink shirt and ask him why he’s so snobbish, he didn’t listen to me, I ask him a couple of times before I throw a big crumpled paper on his back. Then he finally replied to me wearily and asked why I didn’t answer his call, All he want to know is how to cook Bistek Tagalog? God I really had enough of breakdowns and dramas … gush… gush… gush... God I’m not that basic I swear…

I stared at him for like a million seconds and I started to feel something is changing inside of me, The colors of the morning seems darker, sparks of electricity swirls around my head, my pupils dilate and my fingers turn blue and I don’t know what that means but I know it’s not a good sign... but instead of exploding… I implode and go around the office mumbling and making “yawyaw” all over the place. Then I decided to have coffee… before I go back and work on a new storyboard for a phone company.


Fast forward to lunchtime, now I understand why he’s not talking to me, his lunch is “Bistek tagalog” but doesn’t taste like it… It taste like adobo… but in justiceness to him it taste good in fact I finished it all. Well because of that I will teach you how to cook “Bistek tagalog”(Filipino Beefsteak) you poor dummies of mine… Cooking Bistek tagalog is easy as memorizing all the prehistoric bones of a dinosaur. Okay get your pen and notebook and copy everything from the board.


How to cook Bistek Tagalog


¾ kilo of beef steaks

2 tablespoon of lemon juice or kalamansi or Krouch chima

5 tablespoon of expensive Kikoman soy sauce

3 cloves of garlic (crushed or sliced thinly)

1 thumb-size ginger (optional)

½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

½ cup white onion


4 tablespoon of cooking oil (if you feel like rich olive oil is good)


Using your expensive Messermeister knife slice the beefsteaks about 1/2 cm thick and marinate with lemon juice, garlic, soy sauce, a little bit of oil and pepper for about 30 minutes in an expensive glass or ceramic bowl. The reason for these is that when you marinate in plastic or metal container the acid of the lemon would react to the metal or plastic making the taste of your cooking slightly different.

Again using your expensive Messermeister knife slice the onion in rings and set aside.


Now make fire with your stove and put in your Bain Marie frying pan, make it a little bit hot before you put in the oil. When it’s fairly hot add the marinated beefsteak, cover and cook slowly until done.


When the liquid is almost gone and it smells good already increase the heat for a minute or two enough to make the steaks brown.


Add the onion rings and cook for another minute. Now serve it in an expensive corning ware platter including the oil and sauce.


There you go my obtuse, uncleverness and slowness students of mine… well as for Mr. Magno he fly to Vietnam today running away in shame from me…


Happy Independence Day!!!


Before I forget special mention to Oli goodluck there miss saigon…

we miss you… sigh… Tse… double tse…

HOW TO LISTEN TO GARBAGE

Well… well… well… there you are my bored, lonely and disoriented mammalian pupils of mine. Our lesson for today is about music.

My greatest love for blues is the high priestess Nina Simone, I felt for her. Though she is categorized as jazz singer still the feel of her songs are very blues. She is the only diva who would stop in the middle of her singing because she doesn’t feel like finishing it. I’ve come to know her from a far distant past when I used to work in an AM radio station (DWWW am 774 stereo) for four years as a traffic officer, working with Sir Vic Morales (One of the pillars of radio in the Philippines) I’ve come to know a lot of fabulous and beautiful artists of the old world as our programming is all about beautiful music from the past… well anyway, during those times when all my Romeos abandoned me she is always my background music, It feels like I’m in a heartbreaking movie. Unrequited love and untold love stories are more fabulous when Nina Simone’s wails are the soundtrack. Her live rendition at Montruex Jazz Festival during 1976 of “Feelings” is heart-wrenching though funny because she kept on forgetting the lyrics but she managed to get away from it because she plays the piano flawlessly. Her rendition of Frank Sinatra’s “My Way” is oh so lovely, lonely but classy too… Songs like “Turn me on, For a while, The Other Woman, Ain’t got no/ I got life, Mr. Bojangles and Do what you gotta do” are among my favorites. When you want to drain all you negative feelings and your bleeding heart, then listen to Nina Simone… God bless her soul, she died on 2003.

I started listening to alternative music since I join the activist world as an effigy artist which I literally called street art… and that is during my rebellious days when am still lost, aggressive and trying to fit in. Anyway among my favorites during that time are “The Smiths, The Plan, and Belle and Sebastian” and still are. I fell in love with “The Smiths” when “Agee” a punk friend of mine give me a copy of their first album, the fiercely intellectual lyrics of the Smiths don’t matter to me that time because I only like the melody, but now I can relate to them specially that song “Please, please, let me get what I want”… The Smiths releases their first album on year 1984 and I get to know them during the late 90’s… God talking about age? Among my favorites “Death of a Disco Dancer and Heaven knows am miserable now".

Belle and Sebastian’s album “Push barman to open old wounds” is very nice specially “Beautiful, Jonathan David, I love my car and Century of fakers”. The melody of their music is so friendly and warm despite the heavy, articulate and very sharp lyrics. I love the way they incorporate trumpets with other instruments in their music. It’s just so homey and cozy… I love it… I love it… I love it…

Among the alternative pop rock I love are Natalie Merchant, Rilo Kiley and Shirley Manson. Natalie Merchant comes a long, long, way since she left her band 10,000 maniacs on 1993. Albums like “Tigerlily” and “Ophelia” are among my favorites. Her music is very expiremental and poetic which is very evident in her album “Motherland”.

The ever rebellious Rilo Kiley makes you think deeply if you listen to her, Songs like “Picture of success”, “Always” and “Don’t deconstruct” were my favorite from her album “Take-offs and Landings”. Her music resonates some of “Belle and Sebastian’s” melody and tune but more playful.

And then there’s Shirley Manson whom a long time ago I thought was the daughter of Marilyn Manson, the fact that their names have both L and Y with it… Shirley is the lead singer from the band “Garbage” before they went hiatus on 2006; I rediscovered them again a week ago when I tried to compiled all the music in my computer. Then I began to hear that familiar voice of “Stupid Girl”, “Milk”, “Why do you love me?” and “Special”. I love the video of “Special” where she played Queen Astarte defending her empire. The video is quite detached from the song she’s singing. I love everything about it from her furred tangerine vest and black charol mini skirt while flying a space fighter reminiscent of Voltes V air escapades… Love it… love it… love it… Garbage music is so edgy, intelligent and honest. If you remember her video of “The world is not enough” the soundtrack from that movie, It was so beautiful when two Shirley’s meet each other; One is the android terrorist Shirley who killed the real diva Shirley and continue to perform the concert with a ticking bomb inside her android body and the video ends in explosion. In her last video “Tell me where it hurts” from the album “Absolute Garbage” she is so stunning from her make-up to that dominatrix outfit… she’s a bitch and I love it so much that I listen to that same song over and over again… its sounds pervertly sexy and lonely.

Okay with mainstream pop there’s of course the mother Madonna the all time gay icon, then Kylie Minogue the old time gay icon, Mariah the all time transgendered icon, I also like crazy Macy Gray love her in Spiderman even if it’s just a cameo and then there’s the lonely voice of Eva Cassidy who died of cancer long before her songs became popular. As for the locals I always love Ogie Alcasid with his modern “kundiman” renditions of his songs and compositions, Yeah Eheads as like everyone else, Cinderella is timelessly fun and easy to listen, Some of Regine’s song I don’t like it when she starts to hit the high note sometimes it gets irritating and difficult to listen but nevertheless she’s good. And for the new artist I love “Adele”, “Nosettes”, “The Ting Tings” who sounds so 80’s, “Lenka” and of course Susan Boyle…

How to listen to Garbage (music)

Listen to the melody… Music is like a living organism to me, the melody is the soul and the lyric is the physical aspect. Without the melody the lyrics is just an essay. Melody can exist on its own you can listen to it without the lyrics. These is very evident in the law of Multiplex and Minus One where we only hear the melody… like Instrumental as well, if you remember Richard Clayderman, His “Ballade pour Adeline” which is the main theme for “Lovingly Yours” hosted by the late Helen Bela.

Understand the lyrics… Here the law of Videoke applies, there’s no need in explaining it’s very clear how we become so agitated if the lyrics is gone. Lyric is really a poem mostly about unrequited love… that is why I love listening to alternative music because they not only write about love, they also write about moral and social relevant issues.

Appreciate the interpretation… yeah after you listen to Regine for an hour you’ll understand what I mean.

Try to identify… the different kind of instruments that are used in this way you can appreciate the music better. You remember when in highschool and we have that stupid dance demonstration during fiesta where in the teacher in charge would always tell us to wait for the second drumbeat after the intro of music, and I hate it so much because I cannot identify what drumbeat is that… yeah talking about highschool. Anyway I always like it if they incorporate trumpets with music it’s so grand.

Well… well… well… the bell rings already... That’s it for today… I forgot to make an exam for all of you… Have a nice weekend mah darhlings… mwah… mwah… mwah...

HOW TO BE HAPPY

Well… well… well… There you are my lovely cult followers, groupie and almost famous expectators of mine. The world today is beautiful as I said to myself when I woke up this morning and changed my mind quickly when I found out that “Marla” my coffee maker is broken. But I still managed to have something despites Marla’s incapacity to make it for me… sigh… poor coffee maker… anyway I have Van Houten’s soluble, pure and fine hot chocolate instead. I normally used it for my champorado during rainy days with dried fish on the side… Hmmm… talking about champorado, I’m missing it.

Well, anyways… I’m so glad that I moved already to my new table outside the creative big room, I moved out to the creative extension room because I like the lightning there, good when I’m visualizing something. There’s really something with spatial sense among the creatives. Some like it quite, others like it chaotic and others like me, I like it with loud music… whatevah it’s not our topic for today.

Happiness is relative whatever is that means to you. Happiness or Eudaimonia to the ancient greek which literally means “good guardian spirit” but in the modern times it means human flourishing or having a good life. In religious views specially in Buddhist teachings it refer to the ultimate freedom from suffering which then eventually leads to “nirvana”, and these is why am writing about happiness --- the nirvana thing… And by the way there is a very interesting site about happiness try answering the Oxford Happiness Questionnaire at MeaningandHappiness.com

In my years of wandering looking for happiness here in the lovely Kingdom of Cambodia I never thought that happiness can be eaten… yeah literally. I’m talking about “Happy Pizza”, I’ve known it a long time ago this kind of food that will bring you to Nirvana but never had a chance to try it. But that changed last Friday night, like you know you just received your salary and paid all your bills and debt from everyone; and you feel like going to have a beer or two… gush I still feel like am a “yuppie the lucky”. Anyways… Mr. Roderick, Mr. Roland, Ms. Consuelo, Ms. Grace, Ms. Deborah and Me went to have dinner at Pink Elephant restaurant where they are famous for their nirvanic happy pizza, it’s located facing the Tonle Sap and beside Pacharan which is near the Royal Palace.

The dinner started with some appetizers like fresh fried vegetable spring roll which looks like “turon” but god it taste good, after that we have shrimp flambé and other beautiful stuff that you can stuff in your mouth. I have beer and more beer before we ordered the Cannabis pizza. Happy pizza looks like normal pizza but the veggies they used are real fresh marijuana and except for peppers they sprinkled it with dried and crushed chongki, jutes or maryjane seeds including some grounded stems… isn’t it nice. Hehehehe… Mr. Roderick likes it so much he ate almost five as in five slices of that heavenly pizza. Then 30 minutes come and he feels numb… Ms. Grace felt the same too… me too… Ms. Devorah became more playful and Ms. Consuelo looks happy.

We went home in slow motion… but me and Mr. Roland drop by first at a massage, there’s something with cannabis that heightens your senses specially the touches and whatever, It must be the cannabis component “tetrahydrocannabinol” or THC which makes you feel relax and enlightened. The massage is very good in fact I ended up with my masseur who looks like Jake Cuenca when under the influence of Ganja, his skin feels so soft on my skin and his brown bunny looks like a snake on my pale skin. Huh!!! Fast-forward after the massage, Me and Mr. Roland compared notes with our masseur when all my other Diva friends arrived. So we went home immediately.

The next day Mr. Roderick told us about his experience, he felt he was in a matrix movie, everything is in slow motion that when he parted the shower curtain it seems he is captured with a camera frame by frame. And Ms. Grace felt she is being followed by something or someone the moment she arrived in her apartment even when she’s already at home she felt someone is looking at her… paranoia ang trip nang bakla… hahahaha… and of course Me I just slept after the sex trip hahahaha… I am so very flower people so hippy… let’s make love not war in the truest and honest sense of it. As for Ms. Deborah and Ms. Consuelo I don’t know what happened to them seems they are satisfied and happy. The experience looks like a scene from some of Carlos Castaneda’s writings.

Cannabis or commonly called marijuana has been consumed since the 3rd millennium BC. And it’s always associated with religion and rituals hence it’s very popular among the ancient Hindu, Buddhist and Mesoamerican rituals and they called it the sacred intoxication. Now that’s what I’m telling you that cultures and civilization sometimes were born according to the drugs people take during that time… hehehe… just an opinion.

Well anyway… let’s go back to my teachings on how to be happy. Again happiness is relative whoever your relative is. Again bring out your pens and notebook and copy everything from the board.

How to be happy

Get a Job… or make money, as oppose to what wizen elders said that money cannot buy happiness. That is not so true, in the world today where everything is equivalent to money. Money still can buy happiness but not all happiness… as what the ancient Greeks said it’s all about living a good life. Life in modern times is very expensive and to have a good life you have at least small money to live for basic happiness. My childhood was not rich nor poor yet I am happy; but as I grew older and everything is getting expensive… living also gets expensive. And you learn to get contented with what you have but still you wish for more. Life is beautiful when you are free but the bills are keep coming. Now tell me if you don’t want money.

Pay all your debts… Its sad when you look behind your back and people you owe is hounding you. I can relate to this as I am paying a slightly big amount every month for the land I am buying so I sometimes have my low months. I always get by with some helps from my friends but I have to give it back too… nothing comes for free in these lifetime. Paying debts makes you feel liberated. And liberation means happiness.

Forget the people who don’t matter to you… As you go in your lifetime we met a lot of friends and people, but as you grew older, you start to see who are the people that really matter to you. It’s like having an excess baggage when you take your flight and realize that the excess baggage your carrying is not really that worth it and yet you paid for it.

Mind your own business… other people’s business is not yours, it will make you unhappy in the end… I personally experienced this. Even if your intentions are noble in helping someone you will end up as the asshole so better distance from other peoples business.

Indulge in guilty pleasure… sometimes going out of your way makes the difference. Let your hair down sometimes… run barefooted under a storm or get skinny dipping under the moon… enjoy life in its primeval essence.

Be Positive… being positive attracts good oppurtunities and luck. Have you noticed some people who have positive aura attracts people in a bar, in a food stall, they always gather to where positive people are.

Ok that’s it you little dummies…

Oh… sha... sha… sha… Gabor na!!! Finish or not finish, pass your paper. See you in our next lesson… prepare for a quiz next week. Mwah!!!

HOW TO SAVE MOMMY EARTH

I am Nature's arm. Her spirit. Her will. Hell, I am Mother Nature, and the time has come for plants to take back the world so rightfully ours! 'cause it's not nice to fool with Mother Nature.

… Poison Ivy (Batman and Robin)

Well… well… well… there you are my little green thumb devels… It’s not a fad, it’s not a trend, it’s not a bandwagon but it’s a fact, the world is changing… changing… changing… and changing. I’ve been consulting my hormonal mood and horoscope lately and it tells me to do something for Mother Earth before the Mayan calendar ends on 2012, as you can see everyone is talking about that big freezer on top and down under the world that its melting, and that thing that envelopes Mother Earth from harmful UV40 is thinning and that New York city would be meters deep down under water in years to come and that the next Venice would be somewhere near the Himalayas which they had it wrong because its in Macau… And that our biggest *Oxygenetor (Amazon jungle) would become the new Sahara desert. And just imagine all the islands in the Pacific Ocean including my beloved Republic of the Philippines… sigh… If we only have love… huhuhuhu… And that Canada will become the next tropical paradise in the future and that Gaia would become the next red planet. It’s just so alarming or am just paranoid but according to my hormonal intuition there is something big coming, So big that it would make everyone rethink of what is life is all about… Huh!!!

Whatever is there I think its time for all of us to go back to the Basic again… Basic, In the sense that we should be sensitive towards mother nature. Basic in the sense that we should take what is enough, enough for each one of us… Am talking about our consumptions of all the things that we think will make our life easier.

God how I miss spring, oh… yeah I know am not in a four season country… well anyway as far as I know spring is nice but that’s beside the point the signs are showing already… Mother Earth is not getting any younger… and yet we refuse to notice… Our insatiable hunger for things, our voracious appetite for everything, our unquenchable thirst to dominate over nature and our endless desire in making our everyday lives easier has taking its toll… From the small plastic packaging of the things we bought from the grocery to the oil we use in our cars to that thing on the wall that makes the room cold. All of these things are hurting our one and only beautiful planet… Earth.

Am not saying to change your ways because I know it’s difficult, all am saying is to give compassion, learn to live with her and give some time to help her. Be it in small ways… in reality nothing really comes for free, the moment we are born we know we are already indebted to Mother Nature… and lucky for us that we have the chance to sit, laugh, love and enjoy her company… Mother Earth is really the one true provider that keeps every generation and civilization alive. She is resilient but our lives are not.

Well… anyway, with knowing comes wisdom, sometimes intuition helps too. I’m going to share with all of you mammals and marsupials some of what I’ve learned that I had applied in my everyday life… and I hope in some way you will learn something from me even though am just a lonely Diva. Well anyway, okay get your notebooks and copy everything from the board.

How to save Mother Earth… in your own little way

Nothing is really new with my advice it’s been said before but I know it still works if people start to give compassion and time for everything. For me I think time and willpower is the key here to make everything works…

Take time to segregate… segregate your household waste. If everyone in the world will do it, then it would be a big thing. In my apartment I have three garbage bin; one for papers, one for glass and one for plastic bottles. The reason for these is that people who collect garbage actually make money out of it by selling it to recycling plants. As for those organic things such as waste from the kitchen like skin peelings from vegetables and everything that goes rotten, I have a big clay jar where I put all those stuff and cover it with a layer of soil so it won’t smell, weeks later I had a good compost for my potted plants, remember am living in a three storey apartment.

Take time to recycle… recycling all the plastics that can be used as container is good. I used ice cream canister as my lunch box. Some I used as container for my blings and small stuff. Same with bottle jars just wash it and use it as a container. Use that old basket if you go to the market, I used to remember when mother tagged me along to the market with her rattan basket it’s just oh so nostalgic and cool. Recycle grocery bags as garbage bags. I miss those times when bakeries used brown paper as packaging for all those bread… Or if you’re creative you can make a bas-relief of all those stuff.

Take time to turn off… Switching off unnecessary lights in your home is good not mentioning the money you save. As I am alone in my apartment I normally turn the lights on in the terrace, kitchen and living room for an hour and turn it off when am watching TV in my bedroom. Plugging off plugged gadgets when you go to the office also helps but that don’t include your fridge… you stupid… Turn off the shower when you are lathering. Use glass when you do your brushing. And one thing you should tell all your household and family the importance of saving energy.

Take time to plant… even in pots, it still helps to provide your place freshness and oxygen. Did you know that 70% of the free oxygen on earth is produced by all the plants in the world? I have one potted bamboo in my back terrace and a few herbs, I also have 8 potted plants scattered inside my apartment and one big potted Ylang-Ylang in front terrace. What have you got?... huh! It doesn’t need your thumb to be green after all plants are resilient, all it needs is TLC.

Take time to walk… yeah I walk when I go to my barber or the market and sometimes I walk to the park, Phnom Penh has nice parks. I don’t have a car because I cannot afford it, I ride motodups but of course with a helmet, I go for car pooling and commute most of the time. I guess my carbon footprints is not that big… I hope so…

Take time to share… Share these learning to people especially your family and friends it doesn’t matter if they don’t listen, what matters most is that you planted that seed of idea in their mammalian brains. Some grows quickly on them, others take time... whatever...

Well… well… well… there you go my pupils. I hope you will take time to write this on your notebooks. It took God seven days to create paradise, let’s see if we can do better… mwah… you green thumbed devels.

* There’s no word such as Oxygenerator --- I just made it up… what I mean is that the Amazon Jungle is the biggest place in the world that provides the earth a lot of oxygen. hehehehehe

HOW TO MIND YOUR TABLE MANNERS IN A RUSSIAN DINNER

Well… well… well… there you are my revolutionary and beautiful expectators of mine.
Last Saturday I was with Mr. Gush, Dillan and Toni in a Russian restaurant called “Irina” and its my first time there and my first time eating an authentic Russian food. It was lovely and the food is very delicious and wonderful, the place is also nice and very cozy. I like the graphic and pop Russian posters they posted on the walls.

Toni is leaving for Australia to recover from her previous job before she hits Italy. The Russian food is our parting dinner for her and it was such a nice choice for a change from all of the Asian cuisine we normally have. I’m so very gracious and felt wonderful meeting all these beautiful and no bull-shit people. I love the fact that even if you lose someone close to you as a friend, life also replaces it with someone more wonderful and better. It just a little bit sad that I come to know them a little bit late.

I always believe that every culture is shaped by what people eat and I always believe that every trend and pop culture is shaped by what drugs people take on that particular era… like for example during the sixties people go for acid so everything becomes psychedelic, In the seventies they have the organic thing and make everyone bloom into flower people and in the eighties they have this happy pills which make people create beautiful music but forgot to comb their hair. And in the nineties they have the recycled drugs which make everyone looks like a goth and massacred everyone… well that’s just my observation and that’s not our topic for today.

Our topic for today is all about Russian dining and food... and As for the culture aside from vodka and anastacia, All i know is that Russians are proud of their country. Patriotic songs and poems extol the virtues of their homeland. This is very evident with their national idol --- “Pushkin”. Pushkin is to Russian literature as Shakespeare is to English literature. Pushkin is considered the "father of Russian literature" because he chose to write his poems and stories in the language of the common people - that is, not surprisingly, Russian.

Russian food is very good and heavy and if you’re on a diet be aware but they have that so called Kremlin diet too. Russian salads are oh so good and divine. I love it!!! I love it!!! I love it!!! But what I love most is the vodka of course you know me. Russians prefer to have vodka with pickled herring, cucumber and red caviar. They also have a shot of vodka before having the red beet soup which makes your relaxes.

Before I teach you to mind your manners in a Russian dinner, here some list of the most basic food you expect to encounter from their menu. Usually as in generality, Russian menu consist of appetizers such as smoked herring or pink salmon together with pickled cucumbers, they also put good salad along with it and the one I love is the red beet salad which I believe is divine (Russians love mayonnaise) Some appetizers need to have a shot of vodka which I love, (I was literally drunk after the dinner). After the appetizer they served the soup (Borsch) which is very heavy and yummy this is followed by the main course which is consist of meat, poultry and fish, they names are hard to say but the one I love most is Lulya kebab it reminds me of Lumpia shanghai without the crust. After the main course the dessert is usually Morozhenoe or Russian ice cream which I love also. After that the one I’ve waited for the vodka drinking. I think Vodka is god I love it with tonic and a slice of lemon.

Oh here are the list of the basic treat in Russian meal.

Borshch, is beet soup, and one of the most famous Russian traditional foods. Full of vegetables and meat, the layered flavors in this soup are especially nice with a dollop of fresh sour cream.

Pirozhki are little pastries full of potatoes, meat, cabbage, or cheese.

Ikra or Caviar is really something to get worked up about in Russia. Briny and sharp, it is often served on dark, crusty bread or with blini.

Blini are also served rolled with a variety of fillings: jam, cheese, onions, or even chocolate syrup. At any restaurant where you aren’t sure of any of the other dishes, blini are always a safe bet.

Shashlyk or Russian kebabs like any kebab, they can be a combination of meat and vegetables.
Pelmeni are pastry dumplings filled typically with meatballs. This one I like sort of a food fusion. I love it.

Slivki or sour cream accompanies almost any Russian traditional food—with crepes, in soups, and even sometimes in dessert. Often, this sour cream is fresh and often melts into any warm dish, adding to its distinctive flavor.

Morozhenoe or Russian ice cream, they love ice cream so much.

And now you know the basic of the Russian treats its time for you to know your table manners. So you won’t end up drunk…. Hahaha, not really it just that I love vodka. Russian table manners are generally casual. So here it is just copy it on your notebook these good if your going for a revolution.

How to mind your table manners in a russian dinner

Russian table manners are Continental -- the fork is held in the left hand and the knife in the right while eating.

The oldest or most honoured guest is served first.

Do not begin eating until the host invites you to start.

Do not rest your elbows on the table, although your hands should be visible at all times.

You will often be urged to take second helpings.

It is polite to use bread to soak up gravy or sauce.

Men pour drinks for women seated next to them.

Leaving a small amount of food on your plate indicates that your hosts have provided ample hospitality.

Do not get up until you are invited to leave the table. At formal dinners, the guest of honor is the first to get up from the table.

There you are my little dummies, you should go out more often and explore some of that interesting alleys where small and wonderful restaurant existed. You’ll never know what you gonna get. Or you might find me slumping in a corner --- drunk.

GOD BLESS BITCHES!!!

HOW TO COMBAT EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES

I’m tough, I’m ambitious and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, … hmmm… okay…

mama madonna


Well… well… well… there you are my jealous, lonely and envious expectators of mine… I’m just loving Lenka’s “Trouble is a friend”, the lyrics of that song is so very timely for everyone… I guess. It states all about how people get into trouble just by helping other people.

Well the past week is quite mellow and fun for me… We moved to our new office and it took a week to make everything in place. Internet and telephone cables are fixed on the second week so its difficult for me to check everything I had on the net. The new office is quite bigger but still not enough for 90 people. The moving out helps me to sort what I want in this new chapter of my bitchy life. Last month for me is quite fantastic and hilarious it brings out the best and worst in me… hahahaha… and it makes me a little older well in terms of who really are the people that means to me. But thanks to Lóreal eyebug hydrant for men it works for me. After all I’ve been through last month I deserve something expensive something that I didn’t ask from a boyfriend or a friend, something I bought myself with my own money not with the expense of other people. Lovely… lovely… lovely… I don’t need to tell you what I bought… someone might get jealous.

Anyway that is not our topic… Our topic for today little green devels is all about negative people and emotional vampires who would suck you up from your sanity and energy. No am not talking about the vampires in the “Twilight’s” second series “Newmoon”. I am talking about Emotional vampires who draw you in with charm, beauty, talent and pulse pounding excitement. Then they drain you – not of blood but of every last drop of your emotional energy. They are sweet looking, innocent but darkly seductive beings. They are good looking and sexy but unreliable lovers, They use emotions whatever is that to make you pity with them, They could be one of your jealous and competitive friends, they could be your demanding parents, or that coworkers of yours who always complain about his job or bosses with gigantic egos but very small in everywhere else. Or I could be talking with myself hahahaha… no not really. It’s downright scary how quickly they can trick you into letting them come to your life and come back and do it again.

Dealing with Emotional Vampires requires a lot of effort. They may be worth it, they may not. Only you can decide. Sometimes it's better to run away, or not get involved in the first place. But that is not only impossible in most circumstances – it is also very unhealthy. You can not simply run from every situation in life. Life has a funny way of teaching us things, doesn’t it, and if you run away – I assure you these same problems will keep arising until you confront them.

Given you were into a situation where you been wrongly judged. Are you the type of person who would fall apart and fade to darkness or are you the type of person who would stand up and fight back. With anything else in life – you have to learn how to effectively tone out the negative elements and elementals that is there to get you down. If you were familiar with the “Law of attractions” a lot of helpful insights and tips where tackled there, I am lifting some advices from it and others from my own experiences. Okay bring out your notebooks and copy everything from the board, I’m going to have a cigarette break.

How to combat emotional vampires

Do not focus so much on the negativity… By focusing on it so much, all you are doing is creating more negative emotions and situations.

Know them, know their history… The way to anticipate emotional vampires is by knowing how they've acted in the past. Chances are pretty good that they'll do the same thing in the future. The biggest mistake I made before is assuming, without evidence, that though their record has been bad in the past, that they have learned their lesson, and they will never do it again this
time.

Do what they don’t… To prevail over emotional vampires you must go in where they fear to tread. Your greatest strengths lie in doing the things you can do that they can't. For example your job, focus on it. Or your being popular… use it. Or you can try crossing a barb wire… hehehehe.

Choose your words as carefully as you pick broken glasses…with emotional vampires what you say, how you say it, and when you say it are all crucial to the outcomes you are likely to achieve… Of course I’m always misunderstood.

Focus on being positive… For every one negative thing that someone says to you – say something positive to them in return. I have personally done this many times – and trust me they stop after a while. They might think you’re on something – but rest assured they will stop. Misery loves company – and if your not good company – they will find someone else to fuck up with.

Take control … You might not have any control over what your family and friends think or say – but you do have control over how YOU perceive it. Either learn to zone them out or learn to give them the benefit of the doubt. You might have to be really generous at times - and I fully understand that not everyone deserves a benefit of the doubt at all times. But do it for your sake not theirs. Life is way too beautiful – and should be full of love, happiness, and success (whatever that may mean to you).

Don’t try to change others... because quite frankly, you can’t. You don’t have the power to change anyone but yourself. So change the way you feel and react when in the presence of negativity.

Pray (or meditate). Whether you are religious or not – scientific studies have shown that small bursts of mediation throughout the day can help in boosting mood and relaxing you – making you more efficient at handling stress. Pray for yourself and also for your friends and family.

God marlbaro is great… so how are you doing my little devels…

Great!!! now go out and try to be positive… But be careful for the emotional vampires!!!